Support Our Troops Customizable Coffee Mug:
Those were great, weren't they? If you have a little extra money, now more than ever is a good time to purchase one of these fantastic products. All proceeds will presumably go to a good cause.
But since we here at Yes. Yes It Is. love our country extra hard, we're not content to merely purchase Support Our Troops merchandise. No, we've decided to go one step further and actually sell Support Our Troops merchandise. That's why I'm proud to unveil the Yes. Yes It Is. Support Our Troops Catalog featuring items* available for purchase (for a limited time only) right here at Yes. Yes It Is.!** All proceeds go to supporting our troops.
Item #1: Support Our Troops Waffle Iron
Tame the waffle batter of oppression with the scalding, non-stick surface of freedom when you use our Support Our Troops Waffle Iron! With its clean, stainless steel finish and easy turn handle, you'll be "ironing out" peace in the Middle East in no time! Comes with handsome knob on the front left of the control panel. Waffle not included.
$239.79
Item #2: Support Our Troops Foaming Face Wash
Say goodbye to unsightly blemishes with our Support the Troops Foaming Face Wash! Our patented cool, refreshing exfoliating moisture beads will shock and awe your skin into submission. Try not to act too confident when all of your friends tell you how well our surge of acne fighting medicine is working. When the terrorists see your beautiful, clear skin, they'll have no choice but to forget all about their jihad and move to Iowa to open their own Subway!
$14.79
Item #3: Support Our Troops Jockstrap
Tired of the constant pain and discomfort that comes from simultaneously supporting your manhood while also supporting our troops? Well suffer no more! Now you can finally support both our troops and your junk at the same time with the Support Our Troops Jockstrap!
$4.99 (pack of three)
Item #4: Support Our Troops Beekeeping Outfit
Let the whole neighborhood know that you stand with America while you're standing around spraying your beesmoke. Your bees will be begging for habeas corpus when they see you in this baby! Moustache not included.
$1,399.99
Item #5: Support Our Troops Lawn Bowling Set
Let's roll! This stylish lawn bowling set will be the envy of every weekend-warrior on your block! Remember, the terrorists hate our freedom, and what better way to show off our freedom then to throw things at other things? Sorry, that was a trick question, there is no better way!. This is in fact the best way.
$189.99
Item #6: Support Our Troops Troop Supporter
Fighting terrorists is hard work and God knows our men and women in uniform deserve a little rest every now and then. That's why we're introducing our brand new Support the Troops Troop Supporter. Simply prop up your favorite troop with our patented troop supporting technology and they can continue to fight the enemies of freedom (forever, if necessary) while luxuriously reclining! Look below to see it in action:
$299.99 Available in S, M, L, and XL
And that's the end. Just so you know, this entire post was created for that troop supporter joke at the end there. Hope you enjoyed the payoff as much as I did.
...
I'm sorry, I'm not very funny during the summer.
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*All items made in China.
**This post would've been hilarious four to five years ago, but I didn't have a blog then, so here you go. Better late than never.
3 comments:
I'm only commenting to shamelessly plug the return of my new, slightly revamped blog.
Check it out!
I would like to second Harry's plug of his new, slightly revamped blog and also include a link which I'm sure Harry meant to do, but forgot. Read it! Grow smarter!
http://thedixondossier.blogspot.com/
How about some "Support Our Troops" Dogtags from http://www.mydogtag.com/supportourtroops
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